Welcome to the Carnival of MS Bloggers, a bi-weekly compendium of thoughts and experiences shared by those living with multiple sclerosis.
Honesty, Vision, and Perspective
Honesty, Vision, and Perspective
Here is one of my favorite orange shots. I took it in 2007. it was one of my first macro shots that captured what my eyes and brain were seeing.I loved the powder laying there, the pollen, ready to perpetuate the species.
I have always been fond of bright colors. Orange is one of those colors that I can not wear – it makes me look jaundice, as do browns, and yellows.
Noticing the little things, the small details that many pass by, comes naturally to me. I miss being able to hike somewhere and find the little hidden gems. Colorful moss on a rock, rusty old nails along a shore where a town used to thrive, and birds resting after flight.
Sometimes it really pisses me off when other bloggers with MS write about all the cool things they are doing. I get jealous. Then again the MS Societies pamphlets, videos, etc. usually show young, good looking people that relay a positive outtake – good PR? Trying to keep us positive?
I am not so positive about my vision doing wonky things. I hope sometime this summer my eyes will be clear and my balance and legs muscles will allow me to get out and snap some shots. My camera has the fully automatic mode but it just kills me to dumb down and use it.
I had a dream the other night were the orange flowers were turning into the orange logo’s of MS. I woke up thinking how crappy that was. There I was hiking up a hill and every time my lens was focused on the poppies they turned into out of focus MS logos! How suck-o is that??
Finding the Muse
by Nadja
I lay in the darkness but sleep eludes me.
A clutter of useless thought crowds my mind,
These worries wash me in discontent.
But there is no need for worry--
I shove aside all concerns and center my mind.
I escape this husk
Travelling through visions of creation
In this state, everything I imagine, I can create.
It comes to me within these visions--
Time is key
Take the time,
I can manifest each thing I imagine
Results become unimportant.
I am adrift in sensory images.
My hands caress this design I have crafted from old things made new
I feel the texture of the fabric beneath my fingers.
I am not troubled by the distance of my vision
I can see now that I will create this thing
It does not matter when
It does not matter how long it takes
Just the existence of each artistic vision
Ensures I will somehow create what I imagine
There are no words to describe it
Behind my closed eyes, it is entirely clear.
I can wait--
I just must remember the things I have fancied,
As I drift toward slumber
They warm and inspire me--
What is perspective? It is more than just how we view everything. Perspective is how we choose to view everything.
Do we really have a choice about our perspective?
We make decisions all day long: what to eat, what to wear, what to do, etc. We are in complete control over those decisions. Yet somehow, we think or have decided that there is a distinction between those seemingly ‘practical’ decisions and the decisions we make about the feelings that we have.
The fact is each and every one of those practical decisions is based on feelings. We even use language that confirms that we have control over these feelings. “What do you feel like eating?” “What do you feel like wearing?” “What do you feel like doing?” At a minimum, we all have to agree that we have control over at least some of our feelings. That leaves us with only one question: why is it that we control some of our feelings and not all of them? The answer is simple. It is because we choose not to.
Aren’t some of our feelings beyond our control?
Choosing not to have control over some feelings, serves some people very well. If we do not have control over something, than how can we possibly be responsible for it? There is a certain logic there, albeit flawed logic. The reason it is flawed is because it is not true: if we agree that we can control at least some of our feelings, then logic says we must also have the ability to choose which feelings we control.
As adults we make decisions all day long that are based on our feelings. The next question is what distinguishes the feelings that we control from the feelings that we do not control? Is it the strength of the feeling? Is it rage? Depression? Euphoria? Whatever the reason is, who determines the controllable feeling from the uncontrollable one. The answer can only by us, ourselves. Yes, it is true and it does happen that sometimes decisions are made for us. But no one other than ourselves can decide how to feel. In other words, we may not be able to control all that happens in our lives, but we are always in control of how we respond. We get to choose our perspective.
Perspective is deciding how we feel.
Only we can make the decision about how we feel. Only we can know the reasons or reasoning behind our decision. It may be that we don’t know the reasons why we feel a particular way. But whether known or not, our perspective is our decision. It includes every moment of our history, every feeling that we have ever had, the sum of all the experiences that brought us to this time and place. Our perspective is our choice and no one else’s.
Do we always exercise control over our perspective? No, because we are still human and still fallible. But knowing that we do have a choice and that we can often do better, may help us in choosing a better perspective.
This concludes the 39th edition of the Carnival.
The next Carnival of MS Bloggers will be hosted here on July 16, 2009. Please remember to submit a post (via email) from your blog of which you are particularly proud, or which you simply want to share, by noon on Tuesday, July 14, 2009.
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